A Decade in Review- By Keri Mandell

Ten years ago, I was twenty-eight. I was married, living in Boston, and working in Brookline Public School. Such as in life, there were good times and bad. Over the last decade, my life has changed pretty dramatically. After having cancerous cells removed from my cervix and leaning I could never have kids, I was deeply depressed. Then finding out my dad and stepmom had terminal cancer, I found myself in a pretty dark and scary place. Now years later, I did climb out of the hole I was in and can say that I have truly learned to appreciate and love my life. Those dark times taught me that life is fragile. We do not know how long we have. I try to live every day to the fullest, strive to work hard and train hard, to be kind, give back, and hopefully inspire people along the way.  I want to leave my mark on this world so that when I look back at my life, I can say that I gave it my all, that I helped as many people as I could, making a difference in their lives through my actions and words.   

This decade was both good and bad. There were times when I felt like I was drowning and others when I felt invincible. Looking back and reflecting about the last decade has given me a chance to look back and see how far I’ve come. It’s given me a chance to learn some real and valuable sh*t. I’d like to share some of what I’ve learned with you.

Don’t be afraid to follow your heart and do what makes you truly happy.

In today’s society, we are told what to do, what to think, almost brainwashed a little.  For a long time, I felt I had to follow the norm and live by what I believed to be society's standards- you go to college, you get a job, you get married, you have kids, you die…

I was afraid to follow my dreams or even admit I had any. I was afraid to be different, to go against the grain, to stand out… well, now I say screw that. I live by my rules. I discovered over the last decade that fitness was a passion of mine. I was so distraught about the idea of not being able to have kids that I thought I was less of a woman, I was unworthy of love, I was tainted goods. I told my husband to divorce me. Then one day, a friend brought me to my first yoga class. I always say yoga saved my life and it did… it helped open new doors. Yoga has taught me to love myself, and it helped show me that I was so much more and stronger than I ever imagined. After finding yoga, I developed my love for physical fitness. Almost 5 years ago, I quit my job in education to pursue a career in the fitness industry and opened my own yoga studio- Empower Yoga. Was it easy?  HELL no!! Worth it? Absolutely!! I can honestly say that I am living my best life and while being a business owner is hard, I wouldn't have it any other way. I am happy and thriving and so incredibly grateful for my life. It has been so much more than I ever could have imagined.

Don’t be afraid to fail. You have to live your life.

Don't let the fear of failure hold you back from living your best life. Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will. 

Resilience is the secret ingredient to success. If you can figure out how to stay the course and get back in the game after failure, you’ll go places and live your dreams. The truth is, most successful people have spent almost as much time down for the count than they do in the fight itself. For example, Thomas Edison failed 10,000 times before he created the light bulb. 

The lesson to learn from all successful people's stories is if you haven’t failed, you are not reaching high enough. You’re not stretching yourself. Playing it safe sounds easier at first glance, but it’s a mirage and will NEVER get you to where you want to be. If you are going places, failure is just part of the deal. You can fix failure, but you can’t fix the things you never tried. So stop playing it safe and get in the game!

My favorite quote is: Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.” This is where the magic happens. You may fail, but so be it… You have to learn to fail in order to learn to be great. 

Don’t take rejection personally. 

Repeat after me… Rejection is not an expression of self-worth. I’ve experienced a lot of rejection over the last ten years- personally and professionally.  Rejection just means that there is something better out there for you. It’s redirecting you down the right path. Trust that the Universe has a plan and it knows what it is doing. 

Be grateful for where you are now while striving to reach new goals. 

Live in the moment every day. Be grateful for where you are and what you have NOW. While I believe goals and ambitions are important, what’s also important is appreciating the things in your life and the people in your life that are here NOW.  Sometimes we get so caught up in wanting more and more, we forget what's important and often what is in front of us. We need to be satisfied with what we have in this very, singular moment. 

Work out for your insides & not your outsides.

“Change happens from the inside out. Not the other way around.” 

I have always struggled with my weight and appearance. I suffer from body dysmorphia and have battled eating disorders for years. I’ve compared myself to other people and never felt like I matched up or was worthy. I felt like if I had or did certain things that I would be happy.  But what I discovered was that my outward appearance or circumstances still didn't make me happy. I had to stop comparing myself to others and learn to love myself first. 

What you manifest, you become.

Personal manifesting is unreal. If we take the time to visualize the way we want our life to be, truly write it all down, draw pictures of things we want to create and set the scene for our lives, THINGS HAPPEN. It sounds crazy, but it truly works. Think about your vision and goals for the future. Say them to yourself, talk about it to others, release it into the Universe and watch as things start to happen and appear. 

You are not that important to most people. 

I mean this kindly & honestly. PEOPLE AREN’T THINKING ABOUT YOU OR WHAT YOU ARE DOING AS MUCH AS YOU THINK THEY ARE. I struggled to learn this, especially growing up. Like most teens and young adults, you want to be “cool” and to fit in. We are always so concerned about what others think of us. We try to present ourselves in the best way (I mean look at most of the stuff people post on social media), we are afraid to be vulnerable or different.  We are afraid that if we don't have our lives figured out by a certain point that people won't take us seriously or we are less than. Stop trying to get people to like you. Honestly, no one cares if you’re not married, don’t have kids, gained ten pounds. The right people are going to like you no matter what and the others don't matter. But what matters most is that you like yourself!

No one has everything figured out.

We are all doing our best. We are constantly changing and evolving. It’s ok to not know what you want to do when you grow up. Believe me, I’m 38 and I’m still unsure sometimes. It’s ok to now have life planned out and figured out. Enjoy the process of becoming. 

Increasing Mental Strength & Tapping into Your Fullest Potential

It’s so easy to dream.

It’s easy to tell people about your ambitions.

It’s easy to create vision boards and write down your goals.

It’s easy to stand in front of a mirror and declare affirmations.

But… in order to be successful and meet your full potential, you need to put in the work.

Mental toughness will help!

What is mental toughness?

Mental toughness is the ability to resist, manage and overcome doubts, worries, concerns, and circumstances that prevent you from succeeding and excelling at a task or towards an objective or a performance outcome that you set out to achieve.

Physical fitness gets a lot of attention, but I believe mental fitness/toughness is equally important. Your body will only achieve what your mind believes. Having a healthy and strong mind will allow you to handle the challenges and opportunities that life throws at you.

To gain better mental focus and strength and to reach your goals you need to do a few things…

Write down your goals.

YOU set these goals. Goals keep you focused on what’s next, and writing them down keeps you on track. Don’t let anybody else tell you what your goals should be.

Choose things out of reach.

Don’t just think about what is “realistic.” The problem with realistic thinking is that it’s usually based on what others think is possible. They don’t know your potential. Whenever you start a task with a mind toward the potential outcome, you will limit the actions required to accomplish that goal.

Tolerate discomfort for a greater purpose.

Discomfort can lead people to take unhealthy shortcuts. Rather than deal with a problem, people may ignore it altogether, walk away, or reach for something that provides immediate emotional relief, i.e eating, drinking, scrolling through social media, watching TV, etc… short-term solutions can often create bigger long-term problems. It’s important to practice tolerating discomfort by reminding yourself of the bigger picture. Don’t try to escape it. The more you tolerate discomfort, the more confidence you’ll have in your ability to do difficult things and the more you will succeed.

Do one hard thing every day.

You won’t improve by accident. Purposely challenge yourself. Of course, what’s challenging to you might not be to someone else, so you need to analyze your comfort zone and then pick something slightly outside your zone and take one small step every day. Push yourself to become a little better today than you were the day before.

Always do one more.

The next time you think you can’t do something, prove yourself wrong. Commit to always doing one more. Your mind will want to quit long before your body needs to give up. So prove to yourself that you’re more capable than you give yourself credit for, and over time, your brain will stop underestimating your potential.

Strive to fulfill your purpose.

It’s hard to stay the course unless you know your overall purpose. Write out a clear and concise mission statement about what you want to accomplish in life and then start to work towards it every day. When you’re struggling to take the next step, remind yourself why it’s important to keep going. Focus on your daily objectives, but make sure the steps you’re taking will get you to your larger goal in the long run.

Take action.

Go beyond what's normal or typical for you. Push beyond your limits until one day the unusual activity is not so unusual, but a habit for you and part of your routine. Big goals require big actions. In order to reach your full potential, you must take huge steps and actions towards completing your goal. If it was easy, everyone would be doing it.

Stay persistent and NEVER quit.

Remember, Rome wasn’t built in a day. The ability to persist on your path regardless of setbacks, unexpected events, bad news, and resistance to continue firmly in your purpose in spite of conditions is a trait common to those who are successful. Reaching your fullest potential requires you to be persistent; there are no quitters here.

In all, work hard and never limit your potential success and never limit what you will do to create and keep that success. Have monster goals and continue to attack them hard EVERY DAY! Remember that people who are highly successful continue to work, produce and create long after they’ve flourished.